AI Crapflix

Robert Crowther Feb 2026
Last Modified: Jul 2026

In the near future, Crapflix content will be generated by Artificial Intelligence. This will maximise customer satisfaction and so revenue. As enthusiasts and champions of, and evangelists for this innovative revolution of an iconic streaming channel, this website is excited to present for you a vision from beyond the cutting edge.

Next In Line

image of next_in_line

Photo © Northern Ireland Office, changed (cc‐by‐2.0)

The ultimate reality game! 20 contestants fight it out through ten rounds of challenges such as deportment, equestrianism, and answering awkward questions about the Commonwealth. The prize? With space now available, who will become eighth in line for the English throne! Hosted by Stephen Fry.

Kebab Smuggling

image of kebab_smuggling

Photo © Jorge Franganillo, changed (cc‐by‐2.0)

Exposing shocking revelations of Middle Eastern trade in illicit goods. Contains scenes that may be disturbing to those who have been drunk on a night.

Canal Police Chase

image of canal_police_chase

Photo © Linden Milner, changed (Creative Commons Attribution‐Share Alike 2.0 Generic)

Every day, more than one person is arrested on canals for wrecking the environment and endangering the life of voles. This program follows the valiant Canal Traffic Police Team who make the waterways safe for all.

Naked Knitting

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Photo © David Dixon, changed (CC BY‐SA)

A reality show where four contestants stay in a country house together where they interact, build relationships and knit while naked. 56 age restriction.

Desperate Lawyers

image of desperate_lawyers

Photo usmc0491 (Creative Commons Zero)

Five of Americas hottest lawyers take on the ultimate challenge—can they buy a farmhouse in France? Can they survive the French legal system, or order coffee in a cafe? Contains swearing.

England’s Worst Criminals

image of englands_worst_criminals

Photo © Unknown photographer, changed (CC BY‐SA)

Inside the dark minds of England’s most twisted psychopaths. Episode 1 features an ex‐SAS soldier who torched a nightclub as part of a property scam, then sprayed “Malcolm was ’ere” on a nearby garage.

Inside the Brownies

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Photo © By Girl Guides of Canada from Canada, changed (cc‐by‐2.0)

The dark secrets of one of England’s most treasured institutions.